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Western Carolinian Volume 60 Number 04
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Western Carolinian September 8, 1994 Robert M. Robertson The Cheap Seats Juliet asked wherefore art thou, Romeo, and to you freshmen, she wasn't asking where he was. She wanted to know what's in a name. Well, back then, in Italy, it was enough to cause at least a double suicide and more than one murder. A corpse by any other name would smell so sweet. Last week I mentioned that our men's head basketball coach, Benny Dees, had a great name, and he does. But now I've gone a little bit out of the bounds of good taste and done a Top 10 Football Names in the Southern Conference. You'll be happy to note that Western placed three guys in the top ten, at least according to my SC Media Guide. They are in order of preference: 1-James Brown, Sophomore Defensive Back for The Citadel. Heh! The Godfather of Soul... huh! The hardest working man in the penitentiary, ha! has been furloughed to South Carolina. Yow! 2-James Gjone, Sophomore Defensive Lineman for Georgia Southern. Now I just know he pronounces his name "cajone." And that takes real balls, 3-Uras Agee, Senior Defensive Lineman for UTCi His name would have more impact if it was Uras Afire, but that first name alone was enough to make the top three. 4-Joe Don Biggerstaff, Freshman SN for WCU. vVhatever an SN is, a last name like that must come in real handy at frat parties. But if one guy's got a bigger staff, someone else will come along with the biggest. 5-Jack Slaughter, Freshman Outside Linebacker for WCU. That's the kind of last name you want to recruit for a football team. Maybe he'll get to play after Tom Bodine graduates, who's got a pretty good name himself. 6-Brian Simpson, Junior Kicker for UTC. The last name says it all, but he plays the wrong position. 7-O.J. Davis, Senior Defensive Lineman for Furman. I'm sure his mother must be proud to have named him after such an upstanding pillar of the community. 8-Jayson Grayson, Junior Defensive Back for Marshall. Guys with cutesy, rhyming names ought not be allowed to play football, especially for the defense. 9-Geoff Goff, Senior Kicker for VMI. I can't decide if he's got too many letters in his first name, or not enough in his last. And there's no telling what the IRS will do with a name like that if they ever find out. 10-Bake Baker, Freshman QB for ASU. I've just got to feel sorry for someone with such a name, since mine is Robert Robertson, which either sounds like I'm stuttering or they gave my mother too many painkillers before she filled out the birth certificate. So nobody should wonder why I go by Robbie. I hope I didn't hurt anybody's feelings too badly. As they say, there's no such thing as bad press, as long as they spell the name right when they're poking fun at it. Opinions expressed in this column may range from slightly deranged to downright psychotic and can only spring from one sick mind. Therefore, the Western Carolinian doesn 't deserve to have our opinions lumped in with this mad man's. •It Box Seats Fall Tennis Leaue Organizing The Jackson County Recreation/Parks De- partmentis now accepting registration for the fall tennis league which will begin play September 12. The league has divisions of pliy for seniors, beginners, and open singles and doubles. The registration fee Is $10 for singles and $12 for doubles teams. Interested players may register at the Recreation/Parks Department which is located at Mark Watson Park. For more information on the adult tennis league, call the Jackson County Recreation/Parks Department at 586-6333 or 586-PLAY. WCU Rugby Schedule Sept. 10 - NC of. - Raleigh NC Sept. 17 - Wake Forest - H Sept. 24 - St. Andrews - H Oct. 1-UNCC-H Oct. 8 - TBA Oct. 31 - TBA Nov. 5 - Davidson - H Nov. 12 - App. St. - Boone NC building a Strong <PuzzU: Team building The Leadership Tracks Series 9rion, Sept 12, 7 pm "Killian 104 Sponsored by tlpsUon: Chapter of the Residence 'Honorary Omega Chi 'Western's Optional 'Mail 'Welcome Intramural Interests Men's intramural tennis "singles and doubles" tournament will occur 4:00-6:00 PM on lower tennis courts for National and Fraternity leagues on Thurs., Sept. 8th; ans. for All Campus Playoffs Mon., Sept. 12th. Badminton: intramural women's "singles" (sorority and independent) on Wed., Sept. 14th at 6:30 PM on Reid Gym main floor. Women's intramural tennis "doubles" tournament will occur 4:00-6:00 PM on lower tennis courts for sorority and independent participants on Tuesday, Sept. 13th. Come prepared to participate. Results of the Men's Intramural Bowling Tournament are as follows: All Campus Champion Craig Hastings Average 169 All Campus Runner-Up Chris Hunt Average 159 Total Number of Participants: 33 PRE-SEASON SOFTBALL POLL Men's League 1. Kappa Alpha 2. Drillers Sigma Phi Epsilon Regulators Pi Kappa Alpha Lambda Chi Alpha Southern Comfort Hooterville Express Injured Reserve 10. Sigma Nu Women's League 1. Cold Chillin 2. Skywalkers 3. Fearless 4. Phi Mu 5. Toppers MOUNTAIN SKATE CENTER'S ROLLER HOCKEY MONDAY NIGHT'S 8:00 pm till 11:00 pm COST: $3.00 Goalies Play Free (704)456-4441 or 1-800-458-4144 Ask for Brett League Play Starting Soon. Waynesville, NC
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The Western Carolinian is Western Carolina University's student-run newspaper. The paper was published as the Cullowhee Yodel from 1924 to 1931 before changing its name to The Western Carolinian in 1933.
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Part of Collection
Western Carolina University Publications
