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Western Carolinian Volume 72 Number 07
Item
Item’s are ‘child’ level descriptions to ‘parent’ objects, (e.g. one page of a whole book).
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ssbOOK REVIE The Book of Ratings Gets an At By Rachel Mitchell * Wenewsmagazine Being in college, all students know what it's like to get a grade. Tests, papers and quizzes are designed to see how much we ve learned and if we understand it. Then there is Lore Fitzgerald Sjoberg. He grades anything worth thinking about, including Hostess products, Scooby-Doo characters, rules for his apartment complex, Monopoly tokens, Sesame _ Street characters, Thanksgiving foods, sexual positions, plagues of Egypt, the Seven Dwarves, urban legends and office supplies, just to get things started. Sjoberg uses his dry, witty humor to describe why each category gets the rating he gives. For example, Sjoberg picks a category such as Coca-Cola slogans and then lists the saying along with a brief assessment and then the actual grade of each. The only real down side of the book is that he doesnt list more things. Some of the best ratings are for his Rules for my Apartment Complex, Urban Legends, Office Supplies and Scooby- Doo Characters. No Slamming of Refrigerator Doors: This comes well with the category of things | had no interest in doing until they were forbidden to me. Ive never been mad enough at the contents of my fridge to slam the door.... Grade D. And on the Door Handle Was a Hook!": Scary, but youd think that any Prospective murderer would make life easier on himself and open the door with the hand that can actually grip things. Ive never tried opening a car door with a hook, but one imagines its something like trying to remove a bra with a spoon. Grade C.. Staple Remover: Yet another entry in the fun-but-not-for-what-its-meant- for race...! generally just rip the sheets right off the stack; Im heartless that way...Dont get me wrong; | dont sit and talk out loud to my staple removers. No, | just silently pretend its talking. Or sometimes | use it to threaten the phone. Grade A+. Scrappy-Doo: Speaking of inhuman. | just want to get this twisted little bastard out of the way so that | can go back to ignoring him... Grade F. Hahahahahahal! It feels good. Like most experiences students have, Sjoberg gives more failing grades than anything else. Usually though, the worse the grade for the object, the funnier the criticism. The whole book is just one big criticism of things that most wouldnt even think about unless they just had that twisted sense of humor. QUOQUUIUIP)IOQU i joa = Me ew ee i Og ea ee tite al Nit el Pelt a fl PRL aise DI OPE te VORA Pi Fe ogg * RPS On a eid PAIR" ll te",
Object
Object’s are ‘parent’ level descriptions to ‘children’ items, (e.g. a book with pages).
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The Western Carolinian is Western Carolina University's student-run newspaper. The paper was published as the Cullowhee Yodel from 1924 to 1931 before changing its name to The Western Carolinian in 1933.
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