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WCU - Western Carolina University Publications

Western Carolinian Volume 45 Number 08

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Item 1 - Western Carolinian Volume 45 Number 08
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Western Carolinian Volume 45 Number 08

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Western Carolinian Volume 45 Number 08

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Western Carolinian Volume 45 Number 08

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Western Carolinian Volume 45 Number 08

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Western Carolinian Volume 45 Number 08

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Item’s are ‘child’ level descriptions to ‘parent’ objects, (e.g. one page of a whole book).

  • October 11.1979 I HI wish km VR0LIN1AN Page 3 THE BIRDS-EYE VIEW by Jim Buchanan. Jeff C, a friend of mine, and 1 were ridine, around the other day when we decided to stop at a local carnival. After riding the "roeko-planes" and being thrown up on by a ten-year old and a drunk, we decided to go in for a less violent fare—a fortune teller. Things started going wrong immediately. Jeff tipped the table when he sat down and the crystal ball rolled off and crashed to the floor. The gypsy tending the ball leaned over the table and smacked Jeff silly. She picked up the ball and shook it. It rattled. She looked at Jeff, her eyes glowing red, and said, "Do you know how much spare parts on these things run?" Jeff was still rubbing his throbbing nose, and said, "I always thought gypsies were a bunch of jerks!" 1 noticed smoke coming from her ears, so I told Jeff to back off. "Man, all that stuff's fake," he said. That blew the old bat's lop. She raised her hands and flash we WOTS all standing in a pile of itials, a demon with a forked tail standing only yards away. I felt compelled lo speak. "I didn't know you guys could do lhal." Then I looked at Jeff. "This is all vour fault." Then to the demon, "Man, this is a mistake. 1 ain't due fer years yet." Jeff, sympathetic to the end, picked up a chunk of coal and nailed Ihe nearest demon with it, then smiled sheepishly and pointed at me. Then, to coin a phrase, all hell broke loose. The demon flashed a thunderbolt at me, 1 ducked, and it decked the gypsy. Jeff and 1 took the opportunity to clash down a handy corridor lined with doors. Jeff opened the first one he came to. Wc looked Inside to see Mr. Whipple tied to a chair, crying, while several old ladles danced around him, Ego trips? Dear Editor, I am replying to the letter of "a Navy Seaman." I spent two years in the Navy and had a wonderful time. I actually got to sec the world. I loved the Navy but hated the military. Ships and going to sea arc the stuff of romantic dreams. Bui the realities of military life are disgusting. The military. Including the Navy, is permeated by small, weak people who need a power trip to Increase their egos. Mark Wilkins is entirely correct; the military is "mostly illiterate and riddled with drug (especially alcohol) problems." Recruiters, in order to meet enlistment epiotas, will accept anyone who can breathe (I know because as a Personnelman, 1 saw all records and had to do the paperwork to discharge those who could not make it). As for the F.nlisted Test Battery, read last week's letter to understand how difficult that is. Regarding military power, who cares? I wish the U.S. had enough sense to be the weakest military- power—set a precedent. A military power makes sense for the I.R.A. or the P.L.O. because no one will listen to them otherwise. But the U.S. has a far more superior weapon—its world dominating economy. The history of the U.S. reeks of big money interests and bigotry. The U.S. is not the "land of the free" nor "the home of the brave" and until we can create this self-proclaimed Utopia here at home, let's quit worrying about how to defend it or how to inflict it on other countries and peoples who can decide their own political questions. Whoever wrote that chauvinistic epistle will probably make an outstanding military type. He has lhc mind (or lack of) for it. Thank you, Steven F. Filer Like father... Salute, Filius Primus: Sir, you have dignified the name of your father, your illustrious family, this newspaper, and this native home of your learning with your acerbic remarks concerning the Operation of the Farm in Lily Valley. All of us here appreciate your concern for it and for those who continue to husband the land as we are both biblically and politically enjoined to do. Would you be so kind as to do two things, to wit: please drop such ostentatious words as "specious" from your vocabulary in the future; there are not many folks on the Farm who are aware of such arcane terms; second, would you try to wait upon me, as soon as possible, either at my office in the building of harmony and poetry, or at my Villa in the meadow? As the Governor of North Carolina said to the Governor of South Carolina, "It has been a long time between drinks!" Sincerely, I need to have some time with you soon. As always, I remain, Sir, your devoted father, Edward Colt Williams, Senior 003$A|uoioj II 'i°0 sjnm 8ui3(oo3 suioq aAcq pun pe oqj Suuq 'UMop apisdn sbm ji paoijou puB pn siqi peaj noA" ji auiij ajoiu ouq £1 PO »BS pasoQ ZWS'ZbZ \V3 00:6—00:S oo:n—oe:u "Hi—"sanl nuajM iinj SuiAjas osry SP'ZS -3Sj.id.ins—• spo^v SP'ZS IliaqSnds—leg mj no^ |ry—-sanr, gp'ZS —p°°jb»s—HJ *» *»' -Aag 'a"abj{) pire aajg 'B-mo patjj 'saojuij 'simosig ui«h *Uie aVKl 's3a1 U313!H3 A"H!8 »mn —8up|oo3 auioH—sinaiM iuiiaj—[| po SJnqx clBcicJ flS 002$ P"B OS' 1$ MuO—PBFS PHD Sfr2$—sirqd ioH S8' 1$ pe|Bs puB OS' l$—dnos 3peui3iuoH H J N 01 ;nox Joj A//opads-S|opads Ajma / V poo j poo*) C/J//W Auiuin± jooa puy ej\i em Ag seoi jnox ujjbm squeezing the ( li.irmiu. Proceeding to the next room, we found President Nixon, crying, looking out over an ocean completely filled with cassette tapes, Ociasion- ally he would throw another one in and sob a little. Further down the hall we saw a loot ball game. Joe Naniath would take Ihe snap, fade back, and the football would turn into a pumpkin. I was confused. "None of these people are dead," I said. Jeff solemnlv turned to me and said, "Jim, there are a lot of gypsies in the world." As a matter of fact, the one we met at the carnival suddenly popped in front of us. 1 realized we were back at the carnival. Jeff fainted dead away. "I guess I'll let you guys go," the gvpsy said. "I got a new ball. It's a Motorola." Join me next week when I return to Hades to interview all those people who wrote letters complaining about too many columns. Housing Bill passed by Senate In last Monday afternoon deliberations, WCU's Student senate passed in act authorizing the publication of an Off-Campus Housing Guide, "This guide would provide WCU students with information on the varying types of housing available in Ihe ( ullow hee area," noted SGA Vice-President Richard Sullins. Prior to passage of the bill. Senator Luther Hollinsworth, in answer to a question, stated that the money for the project would conic from the SGA account. Additionally, President Roger McKinney told the senate that the money would be specifically coming from the refrigerator leasing trust fund. Newly approved Director of Public Information, Linda Wade, is in charge of the new project. A 1978-79 Guide that had been prepared last year was aborted because the university had not approved the materials. Next, after a favorable report from Senator Pat Hughes of the University Services Committee, the senate approved a bill that would require a reexamination of campus intersections to determine if they are clearly labeled. The bill was particularly critical of the intersection in front of the WCU Supply Store, calling it, "misleading to drivers and pedestrians, the result being that no one is sure who has the right-of-way." Presently, there are no cross walks and only one inconspicuously placed yield sign at the site. The senate approved several appointments. Cathy Bailey. Kathy Cochran. Bill Hooker. Jarrett Thompson, Ronnie Dedmon, and Donna Baker were appointed to the traffic court, with Dennis Jones as Chief Justice, Steve Nye was appointed Assistant Director of Public information; Jeff Tice was appointed as Director of the Experimental Resource Financing program, and Duane McPherson and Kay Stepp were named Comptroller and Assistant Comptroller. Guidelines for election of President Pro-temporc were approved and senators Luther Hollinsworth, Bobby Street, and Bill Wise were nominated for the post. The senate will elect the officer at its next meeting. The senate also abolished the position of Assistant Director of Academic Assistance. Finally, legislation brought before the senate included a consolidated attendance policy for both senate and senate committees, and to establish non-smoking areas in Brown and Dodson Cafeterias. Who's Who Student selection for Who's Who will begin on Wednesday. October 10. and will continue through Friday. October 12. Balloting will take place in Brown aid Dodson cafeterias, and on the second floor of the University Center. Minimum eligibility requirements arc: l*0 semester hours completed: 2.50 cumulative O.P.R.: extra-curricular participation: and other outstanding accomplishments and service.
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Western Carolina University Publications

The Western Carolinian is Western Carolina University’s student-run newspaper. The paper was published as the Cullowhee Yodel from 1924 to 1931 before changing its name to The Western Carolin...

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