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Western Carolinian Volume 56 Number 12
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Volume 56 Number 12 Features The Western Carolinian Page 6 Thursday, November 8, 1990 addiction Dr. John Ritchie Contributing Writer We have all experienced the pain, sadness, anger, and anxiety that often comes with the separation of a love relationship. Generally most people work through these emotions on their own or with friends or professional help. However, if one's usual coping mechanisms don't work, a full crisis may evolve. Increasing attention has been given to the "love" addict, or the person who becomes caught in a delusional and obsessive love with another person. Such a person, during and after the relationship ends, refuses to accept the reality of the dissolved relationship. He or she feels that the person rejecting them is confused and given the proper amount of persuasion will change his or her mind. It's important to recognize the symptoms of a love addict, so that you will not further support their addiction if you become involved with one, or so you can receive help if you identify with these symptoms. Addictive love, or desperate love as others call it, is a result of certain character traits or thinking and emotional patterns. Love addiction basically reflects a diminished sense of self. Focusing on the other person distracts one from direcdy confronting other personal areas of greater pain or fear. Those who are susceptible to love addiction tend to be characterized by a desire to fuse with another (or become one without clear individual boundaries), a sense of entitlement or self-centeredness, idealization of the other, a great need to be taken care of emotionally, and an anxious attachment to the other. Another phrase for "love addiction" is "people who love too much." The followingcharacteristics are adapted from Women Who Love Too Much by Robin Norwood. 1. They typically come from dysfunctional homes in which their emotional needs were not met. 2. Having been denied appropriate nurturing as a child, they attempt to obsessively pursue this need in adult relationships. 3. Terrified of abandonment, they will do anything to keep a relationship from dissolving. 4. Accustomed to lack of love in personal relationships, they are willing to wait, hope, and try harder for the love to emerge. 5. Their self esteem is critically low. 6. They desperately need to control others in a relationship. Having experienced little security in childhood, they attempt to mask efforts tocontrol people by being overly loving. 7. In a relationship they are much more in touch with the dream of how it could be than with the reality of the situation. 8. They seem to be addicted to emotional pain. 9. Their depressive tendencies are forestalled through excitement created by an unstable relationship. If you find yourself being aggressively pursued by such a person, learn how to appropriately respond to this obsessive behavior. For example, state clearly, in words and behavior, that no further contact is wanted. Victims tend to be willing to talk things over with the pursuer long beyond the time when such talks are helpful. This only reinforces the unwanted behavior. Document the unwanted attention and get witnesses. If necessary seek a court order to keep the pursuer away, and seek police protection if there is any risk of violence. If you find that you yourself identify with "love addiction" traits, please consider seeking professional help. Counseling cna help you reclaim pre-crisis strengths, uncover alternative coping methods, obtain support from others, utilize the stages of grief, recognize destructive interpersonal "roles" and "games," accept yourself and the other for who you are, and favorably change self-defeating thoughts regarding such areas as guilt, rejection, self-concept, self-worth, security, etc. If you'd like to talk to a counselor at the Counseling and Psychological Services Center, please call 227-7469 or stop by 114 Scott and make an appointment. Tips for planet Earth Diane MacEachern Contributing writer Q. Can you recommend any publications that will keep me up-to-date on environmental issues? A. E Magazine (bi-monthly subscription $20; PO Box 667, Syracuse, NY 13217-7934; 1-800-825- 0061) includes book reviews, in- depth features, short news updates and interviews with environmental activists. E recenUy received the "Alternative Press Award" for best new magazine. - -Garbage (bi-monthly subscription $21; c/o Old House Journal Corp., 435 Ninth St., Brooklyn, NY 11215; 1-800-274-9909), offers consumer advice on ways to reduce pollution. - -Buzzworm (bi-monthly subscription $ 18; c/o Buzzworm, PO Box 6853, Syracuse, NY 13217- 7930; 1-800-825-0061), reports on national and international environmental issues. Also includes a calendar of environmental activities, lists of environmentally-oriented "adventure travel" and a review of "green products." - -The Green Consumer Letter (monthly subscription $27; write Tilden Press, Inc., 1526 Connecticut Ave. NW, Washington, DC 20036; 1-800-955-4733), a useful newsletter heavy on new-product information, "ecotips," resource lists to help locate green products, and investigative analysis of environmental topics. - -tic (published quarterly, available for a tax-deductible contribution of $20 or more to the Natural Resources Defense Council, 40 W. 20th St., New York, NY 10011; 1- 212-727-4474), stands for "truly loving care for our kids and our planet." The newsletter highlights activities kids and parents can do to help protect the environment. Subscription comes with a family membership to NRDC and NRDC's bimonthly newsletter, "Newsline." Q. What advice do you have for offices interested in recycling paper? A. Getstartedimmediately! You can save at least seventeen trees and keep sixty pounds of pollution out of the air for each ton of paper you recycle. At the fourth International Solid Waste conference in Philadelphia last year, Gail Lemaldi of the New Jersey Office of Recycling presented a paper on office recycling. Her research showed that recycling paper helps save energy; nationwide, office waste-paper recycling programs can conserve the energy equivalent of 384 gallons of oil per recovered ton of paper. Every ton of paper not landfilled saves three cubic yards of landfill space. And making paper from recycled paper stock uses 15 percent less water than making paper from scratch. In fact, recycling just one ton of paper saves 7,000 gallons of water, enough to supply the daily water needs of almost 30 households. The key to success in office recycling programs is employee cooperation: - -Give employees a "pep talk" about why recycling is important, methods of sorting paper, and items that can and cannot be recycled. - -Provide separate trash bins next to employees' desks that allow them to separate paper from other trash. - -Periodically report back to employees how much money your company is saving by recycling instead of paying for trash collection. What Else You Can Do: - -Use less paper. Don't make copies of everything, and use both sides of the page when making rough drafts. - -Recycle waste paper internally as message pads. - -Encourage your company to buy recycled-paper products. To locate recycled office supplies, consult "Recycled Products Guide" (1- 800-267-0707) a directory listing 57 categories of recycled-paper products, including legal pads, computer paper, toilet paper and tissues. Q. Where can I find sturdy bins to use for recycling? A. Keeping glass, cans and newspapers until they can be recycled doesn'thavetobeamajorproduction. Newspapers can be bagged in paper grocery bags or tied together with string. And cans and bottles can be rinsed out and stored in reusable cardboard boxes. But if you're looking for something fancier, check the following sources: - -Rubbermaid, Inc. (1147 Akron Rd., Wooster, Ohio 44691, or your local department store) sells stackable recycling boxes ($14 each) that make it easy to collect three materials in the floor space taken up by one box. - -Better Environment, Inc. (480 Clinton Ave., Albany, NY 12206) manufactures theTrashcycler ($99.95-$l 19.99), a unit with two containers and a shelf for newspapers. - -Windsor Barrel Works (PO Box 47, Kempton, Penn. 19529) offers a variety of receptacles for office recycling. Many office-paper recycling companies will also provide decorated cardboard boxes for glass, cans and paper. - -Paperboy Products (601 GlenwaySt.,Madison,Wisc. 53711) sells 'The Original Paperboy" ($8 each; $14 for two), a cardboard box for stacking newspapers with side slats for easy bundling. - -Environmentin Mind (PO Box 233, Rifton, NY 12471) sells a newspaper stacker ($29.95) made from solid wood, with a "built-in tying and cutting system." - -Mid-Atlantic Waste Systems (PO Box 1959, Easton, MD 21601) has the Mobile Tripod ($42.50), a 45-gallon container with three lift-out compartments. It comes preassembled, on wheels, with a steering handle. For $45, you can get a mobile aluminum cart that stacks plastic bins vertically. Send questions about the environment to Tips, c/o Washington Post Writers Group, 1150 15th St. NW, Washington, DC 20071. Questions of general interest will be answered in the column. * Daily Specials * Full Course Dinner * Ethnic & Vegetarian Dishes ( * Homemade Soups * Burgers & Deli Sandwiches I * Decadent Desserts * Wine & Brown Bagging Baumann heads symphony performance i Monday - Saturday 11-3; 5-9 18 West Main Street, Sylva , NC, (704) 586 - 8989, Students: Present this ad and a valid Student ID for a 10% discount (excludes wine) A performanceby Hermann Baumann, unquestionably considered among the finest French horn players in modern times, will highlight a Nov. 8 visit of the Charlotte Symphony Orchestra to Western Carolina University. The concert, set for 7:30 p.m., will be held in the recital hall of WCU's Music-English Building, a 420-seat facility that will provide limited, but intimate, seating for the symphony performance. *« 3SS ENJOY ONE OF THE HIGHEST FORMS OF ENTERTAINMENT The Lipizzaner Stallions are horses of nobility-the ultimate expression of an art form which dates back to the 16th century. These magnificent stallions perform acrobatic maneuvers that no other breed of horse can eaual. And now, they are here for all to appreciate. Don't miss this rare chance to see them perform, including tlieir AIRS ABOVE THE GROUND. They have, after all, been practicing for the last 400 years. /? The WONDERFUL WORLD of HORSES® ROYAL LIPIZZANER STALLION SHOW Sunday, Nov. 11 2:00 p.m. RAMSEY CENTER WESTERN CAROLINA UNIVERSITY All Seats General Admission Tickets: $ 11 $ 9 senior citizens (age 60 and over) $ 9 youth (age 12 and under) Tickets: The Sound Shop, Biltmore Square Mall. Asheville, The Furniture Shoppe, Hendersonville, Instant Re-Play. Waynesville and Sylva; Radio Station WWIT, Canton, Radio Station WCVP, Murphy; Ace Sports, Franklin; and the WCU Ramsey Center, Cullowhee. For telephone orders or information, call (704)227-7722. Tickets are $10 for adults, $8 for WCU employees and senior citizens, $3 for youths (ages 4-18) and WCU students with valid identification cards. Baumann, who has performed with major symphonies in Western and Eastern Europe, North and South America, the US SR, Japan and Australia, garners critical acclaim wherever he plays. In Vienna, Die Presse called him "the phenomenal Hermann Baumann." In Sydney, the Australian tabbed him "master horn blower... never heard anything like it," and the New York Times recently said he gave "a flawless performance on one of music's most intractable instruments ... spinning out the gleaming-toned melodies." Baumann plays between 100 and 120 concerts each year. He has scored triumphs with festivals throughout the world, including the Vienna Festival, Mostiy Mozart in New York, the Salzburg Festival and the Berlin Festival. Baumann is considered an expert on the tonal problems and playing techniques of both the instruments and the music from the Bach era through the modern period. He owns, and performs with, more than 20 different horns, many of which are the extremely difficult valveless or "natural" horns, popular in the 18th and 19th centuries. Maestro Leo Driehuys, in his fourteenth season leading the Charlotte Symphony, will conduct the Cullowhee program which is expected to include Ludwig Van Beethoven's "Leonore" Overture No. 2; Richard Strauss' Horn Concerto No. 1 in E-flat Major, Op. 11; and Antonin Dvorak's Symphony No. 7 in D Minor, Op. 70. The Charlotte S ymphony is approaching its sixth decade and is considered one of the top regional symphony orchestras. It showcases its professional musicians in more than 200 concerts each year. The concert at WCU is sponsored by the university' s Lectures, Concerts and Exhibitions Series and is made possible through the joint support of grant monies from the North Carolina Arts Council and the National Endowment for the Arts in Washington, D.C, a federal agency. Memphis State professor to speak at Western Patricia H. Murrell, professor of counseling and personal services at Memphis State University, will visit Western Carolina University Wednesday and Thursday, November 7 and 8. Murrell's visit, sponsored by the Visiting Scholars Program, is part of WCU's "Year of the Student," a year-long examination of the role of students in the community of scholarship. The visit will include a free public talk at 7:30 p.m. Wednesday, November 7, in the recital hall of the Music-English Building at WCU. Murrell is director of the Center for the Study of Higher Education at Memphis State. She received the university's Distinguished Teaching Service Award in 1987 and the College of Education's MILK- BACK TO THE BASICS. f^CITY New and used Books; Magazines; Music; Videos 55 East Main Street, Sylva, NC 28779 (704) 586-9499 Crader Award for outstanding teaching in 1982 and has twice been cited by Memphis State for superior performance in university research. Murrell has worked at numerous colleges, professional organizations, corporations and nonprofit groups. In addition to her work on learning styles, she is engaged in research on the impact of college and studentdevelopment and has written about outcomes assessment and adult development theory in corporate education and administration. For more information on Murrell's visit or other Year of the Student activities, contact the Office of Academic Services at (704) 227- 7222. If what happened on your inside happened on your outside, would you still smoke? NOVEMBER 15. THE GREAT AMERICAN SMOKEOUT. AMERICAN > CANCER SOCIETY"
Object
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The Western Carolinian is Western Carolina University's student-run newspaper. The paper was published as the Cullowhee Yodel from 1924 to 1931 before changing its name to The Western Carolinian in 1933.
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![wcu_publications-13954.jpg](/media/w320/wcu_publications/wcu_publications-13954.jpg)