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Western Carolinian Volume 40 Number 29

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  • THURSDAY JANUARY 23, 1975 THE WESTERN CAROLINIAN PAGE 3 Campus leaders duck questions from page 1 tells them to try again. I'll help you (finally a strategic glance at the audience) if you don't get registered, he promises. But don't go down there to start a fight, he warns, 'cause you'll get one. But you will help us if we don't get registered? he's asked again. "Sure." And the University will provide us with an attorney if we need one? Gasp — oh goodness gracious no... The tug of war continues. "We're all thirsty," comes the cry. Beer in Cullowhee. "Yes, that's a pretty major topic," agrees the senator who's more-or-less moderating the performance. Stillion begins to hum., "I'm in favor of that," he states forcefully. "I don't like to ride all the way to Waynesville either. In fact I just drove there this afternoon in a state car — don't put that in the paper— and bought a case." Then, he goes into some dialogue about some state senator fromMeck- linburg County, which he mispronounces. What about Cullowhee, Glenn? Well, the — burp ~ local merchants are — burp — trying to incorporate Cullowhee so we can — burp — sell beer here. (What did this guy's wife fix him for dinner?) Things are getting a little hostile now. The students want to know why the Chancellor doesn't pull some strings to help out— "And where is he tonight, anyway?" Stillion explains it all as the students in the front rows begin to scrape it off their shoes. Voting is brought up again. Stillion, now wishing someone else would say something, (Where's Clemmer?) agrees: let's press the vote. They will register you, they've had pressure put on them, he assures. Sam Bailey, the roaring grizzly, now identified, comes down on the Security Patrol. "We want competent security," he demands. And those locks we've had on order for six months — where are they? We lost a foosball table because we didn't have those locks. Click: Stillion's beginning his bid for an Oscar. "The University's been losing furniture all year. You guys don't get upset when we get ripped off," he sobs. And besides, it's you students who always prop those doors open at night. Security is always closingthem (so that's what they do) time and time again — boo hoo hoo. By this time there's so many tears running down his face that he feels he can completely ignore the next two questions. "Really, we share your concern about security..." "We still want our locks!" "And you'll get them," says Stillion, now sliding into the concerned administrator role. "I wasn't aware that you didn't have them yet," he lies. •them. (Ahhh, theoldRuss-isn't -here-let's-blame-him-trick.) And Dr. Stillion is correct, you do prop those doors open. Sure, we prop them open, a student says. We prop them open because whenever we come into the dorm, it's usually from the direction where most of the campus lies. Who wants to walk all the way to the other side of the dorm to get where the key-card system is. Why don't you put a key-card system on the other doors? (Bravo!) On the other door? Why didn't we think of that. Why, sure, we'll put it there, says Stillion, but you still will have to bear some of the responsibility for security. "I had my bike stolen," offers Roland Johnson, "so I know security's bad," This leads to other examples: tires, batteries, stereos, etc Some of our patrollmen aren't too good, Stillion admits, as he searches for his lost place in the script. He finds it. But, he continues, they do a lot of good that you never hear about: take food to the infirmary, take students to the infirmary, take students to the bus station, take students to jail. Jim Shive, one of the student senators present, decides it's time he maneuvers his Stuka into position for a bombing run. "Memo from Russ Stevens to all residence hall students," Shive begins as the audience becomes hushed,, 01' Russ wants to charge all students for damage done to common areas in the halls when the real culprits can't be found. Stillion looks confused. He leans over to Chat Sue and says just loud enough to be heard: "What's this all about, I don't knowany- thing about this." Another lie, Shive told him about it Monday afternoon. Chat Sue takes his cue: "I told Russ that memos like this would lose us friends..," (Where is Stevens, why isn't he here to take the blame for this.) "We should be consumer oriented," says Sue for the 7,868th time since he's come to Western. Stillion's now ready to try something. What we're going to do, he says, is at the beginning of each quarter set aside a certain amount of money for each hall to pay for damages to that hall. If any of it is left unspent then the hall can use it the following quarter for programming. Way to go, Glenn, you actually fooled some of them with this. We'll just let it be our little secret that what this plan really does is assess money from each student at the begin- ing of every quarter even before any damage is done. At least Stevens's plan took it from us at the end of the quarter after damage was done. That's why Stillion is vice chancellor and Russ isn't. More P-R from Stillion: "We spent over a $100,000 on the halls this summer. We bought this very carpet under our feet, and half a pool table, too." (Half a pool table? Makes it kind of hard to sink 'em in the side pockets, doesn't it?) "If you've spent so much, then where are the curtains we were supposed to get?" asks cont. page 4 SHOWTIMES: Mon - Sat. 7&9 Sat. Sun. 2:30 Mat. Sunday Night, One show only at 8:00pm
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